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ITALY TO PARIS, TEXAS

SEVENTH ANNUAL WORLD RALLY OF TEXAS
SATURDAY, APRIL 23, 2022

Italy, Texas… Think of it as a mix between the worlds of Burt Reynolds and Wes Anderson; more of a state of mind than a state of reality. The ride will begin on a crisp morning on the bustling decrepit streets of Italy, with the waft of breakfast tacos and power steering fluid hanging thick in the air. Slowly cars from decades past either dragged from ditches, purchased from estate sales or drug interdiction auctions creak and crawl slowly into the Italian high street. Festooned in obscure race liveries with many tens of dollars spent in modifications. The cars can be from any era, but lean toward worst-in-class styling and engineering including; humpback Cadillacs, Geo Metros, BMWs with no reverse gear, even an auction short bus thrown in for good measure.

The participants wander through the streets like a homeless man after a drinking a few too many bottles of after shave. Bedraggled, bedazzled and befuddled they are looking for some sort of guidance, which does not exist. No one is apparently in charge. Everyone mills about chatting, somewhat nervously, while admiring the lack of fiscal and mechanical discretion of the fellow participants. Then someone will mysteriously wander from the din and start handing out very poorly drawn maps and will mumble about lunch in Athens and something about an off road portion of the rally with the final destination in Paris under the 1/10th scale redneck Eiffel Tower.

To Participate: In general terms, participants all purchase or borrow an old beater or random ride and see if it will make the 300 mile route… with a series of challenges! No Fees or Registration (since no one is really in charge). Meet us in Italy, Texas around 9am. This is not a race, if you “win” we will make fun of you mercilessly behind your back. There are trophies for “reddest car” and other relevant categories. The only rules are that any “ejectibles” must be biodegradable, no rotten eggs and don’t throw anything at cars worth actual money. Costumes are encouraged, Motel 6 parking lot is generally where the afterparty rambles into the night.

The event was conceived by friends who drink too much and have ideas. THIS EVENT IS NOT ENDORSED, SPONSORED OR OWNED BY HAGERTY, THE PUBLICLY TRADED INSURANCE MARKETING AGENCY.